This hairtastophe has to end

If you don't know what a hairtastrophe is, don't feel bad. I made the word up. Even though I am stickler for the English language ( often known as a grammar nazi) I consulted with myself and agreed that it is now okay to couple anything with -astrophe to suggest a particular type of catastrophe. I have previously used fatastrophe to this effect and the grammar police haven't come for me yet.

 My hair is officially a disaster. not quite warranting international aid as it's nothing a good hair cut wont fix and yet I somehow seem lax in getting myself to the hair dressers. 
Unless I want to wear it pinned off my face, I have to spend a good 40 minutes drying and straightening it or it looks like an unruly bush. My fringe is now so long that I can no longer wear it normally and have been forced to sweep it to one side where it will either make some sort of weird s shape on the side of my head or repeatedly flop in front of my eyes giving me a look made popular by mood adolescents who hang around the book shop declaring John Green to be a Zeitgeist of our times. On the the plus side, as someone who works in the children's section (which also encompasses teenage books) this allows me to blend in seamlessly and I can move among them unnoticed. It also works out well for going to the gym as it takes minimum effort to get all my hair off my face when things get all sweaty.

 On the other hand I do look ridiculous the rest of the time so as pro and cons list go, my stupid hair isn't exactly winning. I feel the bite of irritation every time I catch a glimpse of my reflection and it leaves me resolved to get this sorted. My hair is beyond needing to be cut and so I've decided I will have my amazing makeover on my next day off which luckily is soon. I'd love to say I'm going to do something really different that will totally change the way I look but I imagine I will probably go back to my beloved bob. It suits my face and to be fair I've been getting my hair cut in some version of that style since I was 4 so it would want to. Let's pretend for now that I don't remember that every time my hair is restored to an actual hair style I rejoice and declare I love it and then promptly remember how much work it takes to get my hair into a bob shape once its been washed or how annoying it is to be in the gym with hair I can't tie back that insists on bouncing around the place with far more enthusiasm than I, myself can muster.
At this stage it's either going to be me or a hairdresser going at it with a scissors and time plus many experiences have taught me life and my hair are both better when I'm not the one giving myself the makeover. 

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