The worst girlfriend in the world

Okay so perhaps there are worse girlfriends out there than me. Many wanton women having affairs or worse and I am not guilty of those level of offences but I have been drawn into working longer and longer hours and its caused me to disappear from my own life and consequently from my relationship.

I started working in social care at the end of January, at first I eased myself in gently and even had weekends off but then I asked to be on call for relief hours and over the last few weeks I seem to have more than I can shake a stick at. Not sure why I would be shaking a stick at my hours but that's beside the point.

I have discovered in myself a terrible inability to say no when I get called for last minute hours and this often means nights out are abandoned and trips out of Waterford are shelved away for later. In the bookshop I used to lament the fact that I was only off one weekend in six and it was tough to get away anywhere but not even when I do manage to be scheduled for work on a weekend, I could still get a last minute call to cover for someone and I will find myself saying yes, that's no problem when really I am thinking about how much I was looking forward to my days off. 

As well as the last minute nature of work assignments, I am sometimes called to do late nights and that means that I am permanently tired. I certainly have been for the last few weeks and as I am sure you can imagine that doesn't make me a whole lot of fun. I am saying I am too tired to drive, too tired to cook and sometimes Stephen calls over to find me rolled up in my duvet like a burrito napping (that's more frequent than you would think).

Because I am always on the go, in my downtime I often want to lie down, read a book, stay inside and not interact with another human being. That's just the sort of social butterfly I am. Then on the flip side Stephen does not think this sounds like very much fun, particularly given that I have a lot less downtime than I used to. 

When we do go out somewhere for the day it is often with the unspoken hint that I would rather be at home, potentially lying down with my book so I am like a reluctant child being dragged on a walk. At night when I do make it to a gig I am often shattered ( from all the working) so I am out but thinking of bed and on some occasions leaving a little early just to get there. 

Perhaps I am not the worlds worst girlfriend but at the moment I am surely not the best and I am possibly the most boring but then again there are worse things I could be accused of.