The ghosts of boyfriends past



A lot of people have a relationship they look back on fondly, the one who got away and so on. Well if think this is what this blog is about then prepare yourself with disappointment because I don't have one of those. My most recent break up is more likely to fill me with sadness than trauma when I look back on it but that's not the one that's been haunting me. 


Very recently an ex of mine got in contact. Not someone I had thought about in a very long time and to be honest someone I didn't particularly wish to think about. If anything it made me feel quite old because we split about 13 years ago and nothing about the relationship gave me warm fuzzy feelings. He wasn't looking to see me again so it was reassuring to know he hasn't completely lost his head but he had just been through a difficult break up with a woman who hasn't treated him very well and this has made him reflect on how he behaved in previous relationships. I think he felt his uppance had come and it very well may have. There was no danger he would have won boyfriend of the year, he was a pretty terrible ex too come to think of it. 

While I appreciated him feeling bad enough about how things had gone that he was willing to get in contact, it was a time in my life I wasn't particularly eager to look back on. In this instance I did give him some advice because it's been a long time and I have moved on so I haven't stayed angry all this time. It feels like that would have been a waste, they say anger is like drinking poison and then waiting for the other person to die. While I was willing to be magnanimous in this one instance, I wasn't looking to become friends with a guy who quite frankly had been a bit of a dick in his time. Now I've sent him on his way I'm just hoping that this doesn't suddenly encourage other ex's to crawl out of the woodwork looking to get in contact. The only blessing is that while I have made some terrible relationship decisions in my time. There hasn't been all that many of them so it's a short list. 

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