Laura really doesn't like confrontation


Its true, I really don't like confrontation and I can say this with complete confidence because really who is a better authority on me than me. I have always shied away from confrontation, going along with things so as not to be difficult and biting my lip so that I don't have to feel that awful prickly feeling I get before a confrontation of any kind. I am not sure why I am so bad at it but I do know from the sick feeling I get just thinking about it that I haven't gotten any better with age.

Last night I was supposed to go to Clonmel for a Crossfit class but when I went down to load up my car I discovered that my neighbour in the spot beside me ( who frequently parks like a drunk who is in a hurry) had only the tip of her car in the space and the rest of it was angled towards mine so I was trapped. Now a more skilled driver probably could have manoeuvred their car out of there anyway but unfortunately I didn't have one to hand, there was only me and my inaccurate reversing to contend with. If I had known who the car belonged to then I would have knocked on their door and explained the situation in an embarrassed manner and asked them to move their car politely ( because that's just how I do things even if I am not the one who did the half ass parking job) but I couldn't see what apartment no it was with the car covering that part of the space and there is no actual logic to the parking allocation in my complex. It was suggested to me that I could have beeped my car horn aggressively until the car owner eventually investigated but I recoiled in horror at the thought because surely they would be pretty annoyed at that stage ( as would all of my neighbours) and I really couldn't have faced an angry confrontation during the weepy stage of sugar withdrawal, I'd have cried for sure and it would have been mortifying. It was also suggested that I leave a note on the windscreen suggesting they park better next so as to not trap me in my parking space but I was too worried that they might be annoyed and would see my apartment number and come talk to me about it. So what I did was nothing. I went back into my apartment and unpacked my stuff and decided I would just have to go to Clonmel in the morning.

This brings me quite nicely to my second episode of non confrontation because as I went back inside and changed into my pyjamas and a woolly jumper friends of my new house-mate started to arrive. She moved in on Sunday as the guy I had been living with for the last year has just moved in with his girlfriend. I was a little apprehensive about living with a 22yr old student but I wasn't exactly given a say in the matter. So as I started making soup and dinner in the kitchen, she and three of her friends were settling down to take away and wine in my living room. I was a bit annoyed as she didn't mention it to me that she would be having people over ( I think its a courtesy when you are living with a stranger)  plus they left plates on the floor and wine on the table and were just generally quite noisy as they went back and forth between her room and the living room. I ended up sitting in my room for the evening stewing but not saying anything. I deliberated and I put it off trying to decide what would be a reasonable hour to ask them to keep the noise down and simultaneously wondering how I ended up back in student accommodation. I even contemplated texting my house-mate, thinking that would be less awkward. I was steeling myself up for the chat at 11 when they all headed out  the door to go into town and I was spared the discomfort. But I did get to wake to sticky plates in my living room and the distinct odour of wine.

Then this morning I discovered my car was still blocked in and I missed the morning class while feeling truly pissed off and absolutely ridiculous. My neighbour did eventually leave for work and I got to take down her apartment number to avoid this charade again. I made it to Clonmel later than planned and felt a little annoyed by how my day off panned out. I also texted the house-mate saying we need to talk as it looks like the time has come to lay down some house rules or I'll find myself in a fancier version of manor village ( the student accommodation that was my home for four years)  but having a lot less fun. She's away till tomorrow so the confrontation looms over me until then and I wont lie to you but I am positively dreading it. I am sure as with everything else, practice will surely make me better.

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