How to be brave


Being brave means many different things to different people. To me right now it is about being by myself and not defining myself as the other half of a relationship and you know not freaking out everytime I remember I have do this solo going forward. Apologies to anyone bored off their ass by my break up tinged blog posts but it's only been two weeks(tomorrow) so bear with me, I will be thinking of him less with every post (at least I hope so).

Bravery for me is wearing all four shades of irridescent eyeshadow from my new eyeshadow palette because this bitch likes to sparkle and hoping I look more like the beautiful mermaid of my dreams and less like a drag queen.

It's about wearing ultra tight leggings into town because I have convinced myself they are flattering but still hoping I don't look ginormous in them and that no one moos at me (even in their heads).

It's about driving that shortcut to my sisters house even though I have only gone that way once before, it's all back roads and I have the most horrible sense of direction. The safer, familiar route is way longer and I felt so triumphant once I successfully conquered it. 

It's about putting myself out there socially and making an effort to spend time with other people even though I am tempted to stick myself to the couch and hibernate under a blanket reading books and watching bad tv.

It's about contemplating joining a dating app even though I can't imagine dating anyone new but not because I am anywhere near ready to date but because it's nice to be flirted with and many years of only having eyes for one man means I am totally inept at talking to grown men in a flirtacious manner.

It's about going forward into the world to meet new people with alcohol as a crutch or a boyfriend to lean on. It's a scary world out there and I will be taking baby steps but I am all about being my kind of brave.  

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