aaaand it's almost new years eve

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This New Year's Eve there's every possibility I'll do what I did last New Year's Eve which is nothing at all, not even watch a TV countdown.
 The world won't explode either way , I won't care and at the end of the day it's just another Tuesday night except TV is shit. Or perhaps, for the first time in a good few years I might be very brave and venture out. eek

Up until a few years ago I went out of my way to try and have a really good New Year's Eve despite all the evidence pointing to the fact that all the previous ones were unmitigated disasters. There was the year I was 20 and living in Switzerland. When I had been booking my flights home for Christmas I had only just been living there for a few weeks and couldn't imagine wanting to spend more than a week at home so I found myself back in an empty Swiss apartment New Year's Eve with only a box set of Audrey Hepburn movies to keep me company.

Or the year after that when I was living at home and rang in the new year in the bathroom of a local night club ( getting sick -classy bird ). At least I believe that's where I was because my memory of that night is somewhat hazy but I do know I had a huge argument with the guy I was dating, woke with impressively bruised knees (from falling up steps) and the mother of all hangovers as well as being fairly broke from a terrible night out. The following year it was more of the same, I think but I honestly couldn't tell you. That might be because it's going back a few years and Im ooooold or perhaps because such occasions involve such copious amounts of alcohol that everything is a bit hazy. 

I do, however, remember the new year's after that because it was a bit of a winner as these nights go. I was still living in Clonmel and we had a handful of choice venues to spend our night. If you've ever had the pleasure of going out in my delightful hometown you might be picking up on the sarcasm here. If not, let me spell it out for you, our options were not good and most of the pubs you wouldn't normally want to be in were packed way beyond capacity and had a queue to get in with a cover charge to boot. I was recently single and desperate to ring in the new year in the best spot but my friends could not agree on where that was. This resulted in me going back and forth between the same two or three bars before accidentally settling on the one my ex was drinking in (at this stage it was too late to get into any other bar) and then having my night ruined when he decided it was appropriate to chase the guy I was with out of the bar and challenge him to a fist fight.

It wasn't long after that I started to question the logic behind trying so hard to make New Years Eve so special although perhaps in retrospect I really should have been looking at the copious amounts of alcohol I was putting away and my somewhat questionable taste in men over the last few years but I suppose I can't learn all my life lessons at once. That would be too easy. So one year I stayed in for new years and watched a movie and nothing happened. Just like that I realized I didn't need to try so hard and that one night didn't matter as much as I thought.

I have stayed in every new years since with the exception the one about 2 years ago when I mixed a pretty unhappy relationship with a big bottle of drunk and had a teary disaster of a night. I think I've grown up since then and I've certainly moved on so staying in or going out this New Year's can be only be an improvement on my last one. 

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