Home alone

As someone who has lived alone for about 8 months, the idea of a night home alone shouldn't really bother me. For the most part it doesn't. I'm used to my apartment and the surrounding noises; the doors slamming, the neighbors shouting, the dogs barking and none of it bothers me too much anymore but this is different.

I've decided to spend a few days of my week off down in my parents house. I can go to the gym, I can see my nieces and just generally relax. My parents however are also on holidays this week in Kerry so until the weekend I am down here by myself and honestly I've only been here two hours and it's a little spooky,

So my parents live on the outskirts of town but their house is up a dark slip road so we don't get street lights or much traffic up here and they have a reasonable sized garden so you can barely see, never mind hear the neighbors. The house is a lot bigger than my apartment and a lot older too. You know what the worst thing about really old houses? it's that they creak and groan and provide plenty of fodder for an over active imagination such as mine.

When I was younger, like a lot younger, I used to wake in the night and need the loo but the bathroom is all the way downstairs. I'd creep down the stairs but passing the dark rooms with doors partially a jar always made me nervous as though there were countless monsters lying in wait. By the time I'd get out of the bathroom I'd have made myself so uneasy I'd have to run all the way back upstairs and then lie in bed listening to my heart beating madly. Even though I'm not that little kid anymore, the residue of that old fear has stayed with me and I still feel a growing sense of unease late at night passing rooms cloaked in darkness.

I remember once my sister, who is only slightly older than me was minding myself and my brother for the night. I can't remember how old I was but I must have been in my teens. Anyway, she had a friend over and they decided it would be hilarious to pretend they had seen a man in our shed ( which old and dark and kinda big) when they had gone down to fetch fuel for the fire. Now I'm pretty gullible so It may not have been that well thought out a lie but I got freaked out by this. In fact the thought of us home alone while some creepy and potentially dangerous man was near by had me worked up into a bit of state, so much so that my sister (who knew this was lie she had made up) started to get freaked and we ended up wanting to call the guards. Eventually she did confess she'd made the whole thing up.

Mostly Though I stay here when my parents are home and I'm just so used to other people being in the house that it feels strange and empty when I'm here alone, knowing I will be for several more days. But If I've survived the best part of a year living in a city apartment by myself  then I pretty sure I'll cope somehow with this