Liar liar face on fire

I am a self confessed, terrible liar. Not that I need to confess anything because all you have to do is watch me try to lie my way out of something convincingly and your deductive skills should do all the work for you. I am the sort of twitchy, red faced liar who gets a little bit clammy while spinning an unconvincing tale.

 Now I am not just saying this because it is a skill I will never master but I actually think this is a good thing. The trouble with people who are very good liars is that how trustworthy they are is directly proportionate to how well they can lie. Sometimes you find yourself wondering if what you're being told is the truth or are you just falling for bullshit again while they laugh (secretly) at your gullibility. Perhaps its just me who worries about such things but I am in equal parts cynical and gullible mostly due to experience and it leads to very confusing times for me. Feeling like you believe what you're being told but also incredibly suspicious that you're being lied to and then my head melts and that's the end of that. Well here's the good news, there's no danger of that with me.

 I remember once as teenager, I wanted to go to a houseparty or I wanted to stay on at one but I was supposed to be in a friends house and be home by 12 and I rang my mum to say my friend was asked to stay in and babysit her younger sister and would it be okay if I stayed over. I spent a few more minutes chatting to my mum and then she asked where my friends mum was going and I said she wasn't going anywhere because I'd already forgotten the cover story I'd come up with and that was the end of that. In later years I took to telling my mum the truth about where I'd been but using a sarcastic tone and she would just tell me off for being a smart arse and then assume I'd stayed in watching dvds for the night. 

 It can be a pain and if I knew how to play poker my poker face would suck. I have too expressive a face and not enough control over my emotions so in many senses I am an open book. Usually before receiving a present I will prepare my enthusiastic face in advance just in case it's something I am not happy to receive and I don't want my face to give me away. I stumble and mumble and forget what I was supposed have been doing and trip myself up at every opportunity. So now I have a new focus. I have abandoned any attempts at being a semi successful liar. It is not a nice thing to be really good and will instead work on not saying absolutely everything that pops into my head and maybe improving my tact. Just as you can be too dishonest, you can also be too honest just ask any five year old for their opinion and you'll soon know what I mean. At least I know what camp I fall into. 

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